She never thought a kiss could kill… Samantha didn’t mean to hurt anyone. She was just trying to fit in...and she wanted to make Zee a little jealous after he completely ditched her for a prettier girl. So she kissed Alex. And then he died—right in her arms. Was she really the only person in the entire school who didn’t know about his peanut allergy? Or that eating a peanut butter sandwich and then kissing him would be deadly? Overnight Sam turns into the school pariah and a media sensation explodes. Consumed with guilt, abandoned by her friends, and in jeopardy of losing her swimming scholarship, she’ll have to find a way to forgive herself before anyone else will. - Goodreads.com
Wow. This story had me from the very first page and never let go. What a heart-wrenching story. It's a strange thing to have happen, and yet I wonder why we don't hear about this type of thing happening more often. Who could know that if you ate a peanut butter sandwich before leaving home, then go to a party and kiss a guy whose allergic to nuts, that it could actually kill him. How sad. Not only does everyone in this story turn against this poor girl for not knowing about his allergic and being the person who happens to cause his death, but she herself can't stop punishing herself for what she's done.
I felt so very bad for Samantha. It was just heart-breaking to read. She gives up everything that meant something to her out of some misplaced feeling that she doesn't deserve to have her dreams since the guy she killed (almost accicentally) can't have his. Being inside her head was such a sad place to be, but at the same time, she didn't come across as whiny or pitifcul. She was strong. I didn't always agree with all of her choices... there's one choice she makes about halfway through the book that had me realing. I wanted to shake her and scream at her that she doesn't really want this! But I can see why she would be so confused and not thinking clearly. Everyone around her is bullying her over what happened.
I loved the love interest, but he's also my only complaint with the story. I felt like I hadn't had an opportunity to really know him very well. I would have liked to have seen a bit more of him during the story so that I could feel like he was important. But I did like what I saw.
This was just a really beautiful story with beautiful writing. I would read it again.